What Happened to Friday5?

Fizzled out for Bets. She'll share what she wants, when she wants.

Sick of Juice?

When Betsey was first diagnosed with diabetes, she was under the false assumption that she could have sweets, as much as she wanted, especially soda, diet, because she could just give insulin and everything would be OK. During her hospital stay, there was an abundance of diet ginger ale and diet coca cola, beverages we never have at home. David felt sad, guilty, overwhelmed, helpless, depressed, anxious - pick an adjective - and he allowed her to consume an awful lot of soda when I was not there.

The assumption grew more so when she got the pump. Sneaking little bits of food here and there, bolusing for it through her pump to cover the carbs, and she thought everything was good. But that's not the case. Just because she can give insulin to cover whatever she eats doesn't mean she can eat what she wants, when she wants.

Juice was in the same category as soda. We never had juice in our house, except for orange juice to go with breakfast daily. Juice boxes were always a treat at birthday parties or as a sweet drink in summer. Now with diabetes, juice is like medicine for Betsey. We have stashes of the stuff; Juicy Juice, Minute Maid, Capri Sun, Motts, Apple & Eve.... we rotate them and keep several kinds "in stock." We have a special spot for the juice boxes, a place where any of the little people in the house can have them readily available in the instance someone needs to get one to Betsey because she feels too weak to get one herself.

Even all of our friends' little people know where the stash is and who it is for. Some of the younger littles will still ask when they're over, "Juice box?" to which I always reply, "Those are for Betsey." And they know it's for Betsey. I think they think one day I'll just let them. It's too tempting for them to see this array of colorful fruit juice boxes neatly lined up and right at their eye level, begging them to grab one. Like those candy bins in the grocery store, where you lift the cover to use the scooper to grab a sizable amount and fill a plastic baggie--those beg for you to lift the lid and grab just one.

Last night I heard Betsey's sensor alarm on her pump going off. Waaaawooowaaawooooooo. I went in to test her. It was about 11:30pm. Low. 57. She was a little restless so she must have felt the low but the overwhelming need for sleep at that hour was winning and allowing her to partially sleep. I grabbed 2 sugar tabs from her DB and put one in her mouth and when she finished it, stuck the other one in her mouth, made sure she chewed and swallowed, put on a temporary rate for an hour to allow her blood sugar to rise a bit.

Around 1:30am I heard the alarm again, and it's vibrating too, so it must have been going off for a few minutes. Low again. 65. Going back through her sensor on the pump I noticed that she came up to around 80 after the sugar tabs earlier, but never fully recovered and dipped low again shortly after. She was mumbling nonsense and was quite restless. I decided to get her a juice this time; easier to get down at that hour. Usually we have a small stash upstairs for cases like this, but the supply was all downstairs.

I grabbed one. Didn't look at the flavor.

I jostled Betsey to have her sit up and drink the juice. She didn't want it. She was ornery. This low blood sugar thing while she's sleeping is not what she wanted to deal with at this hour. I got her to take a few sips, and she tried to just lay down. She had to have the juice at this point-- it's medicine to "make it better." I had to really try and wake her, more than I usually do, and she got combative. She swung her arms, flailed about... She complained she didn't like juice. Not that flavor. Didn't want it.

I ran down to grab another one. Different kind, different flavor.

She barely drank another half, but I figured half from one, half from another, that would be fine. I put another temporary rate on her pump to slow down insulin delivery through the morning so she could rest easier. 15 minutes later her blood sugar had come up and she was sleeping soundly.

She is sick of juice. What?

Who gets sick of juice? What kid? A diabetic kid.

Juice is no longer a treat. Sugar tabs, which taste better than a sweet tart, are not a treat. They're not even "good" anymore. We've tried all the flavors, have tried many juices, even resorted to smarties or other hard candies to teat a low. Doesn't matter what it is. It all gets old and it's all sugary sweet and tastes the same after a while.

And we're only 4 years in.....

Memorial Day Weekend

3 day weekends are always nice, for many reasons. One is that I can get extra time in the morning to get a good, solid workout in and not have to rush home for Speedo to leave for work. I don't feel the stress of starting at a crazy hour in the morning and worrying about making sure I can get in what's in "the plan" before the magic hour that hits when I know I have to be home to start my Mommy duties.

Saturday there was a local road race in town for a great cause remembering a local runner who lost his battle with cancer at a young age. Jen and I ran it together. Great course-an out and back, flat, by the water. A quick easy 5 mile run.

Jen, Aim and I went out for desserts and a glass of wine last night to celebrate.... oh yea, there wasn't anything to celebrate because we as women and mothers do not need an excuse to go out and celebrate with chocolate desserts. Ever. And I knew I needed those carbs for my ride in the morning. Our chocolate desserts were served on dinner plates and doused with syrup, ganache, frosting, morsels, whipped cream. It was like heaven on Main Street!

This morning 6 of us did a great 50 miler bike route - a very pleasant ride. I didn't find it terribly challenging but rather enjoyable and comfortable. A new route is always good for a change. I have not fallen off my bike - yet - with my clip shoes but I think of it every time we have to come to a stop. I make sure I disengage the clips before stopping, very conscious of the fact that if I don't unclip, I will topple over. We came to a stop sign this morning, and for whatever reason, I didn't unclip..... and then I was just about at a dead stop and went to take my foot and put it on the pavement, a natural reaction.... my foot wasn't moving - I forgot to unclip!

That is a scary feeling! I haven't fallen off my bike since, geez, I don't even remember when the last time was! I kind of panicked and I jerked my foot so hard and twisted my ankle in a dire attempt to get it out, and just saved my butt from falling right down. I had that feeling you must get when you're clipped in and you fall. It's like you just have to go with it, there is nothing you can do--you are attached to your bike and it's falling, and so are you. Man, that would have hurt. Rattled me for a second.

The skies were a little ominous and at one point, too... about 30 miles into the ride, we got hit with hail out of nowhere. Some of those little suckers hurt! It passed quickly. By the time I got home, as I pulled in the driveway, the thunder and lightening had started and I had to race to put my bike away! Always an adventure. Here's a Knock Knock joke for you I shared today-always makes me laugh doing it to someone!

Knock Knock?

Who's there?

Interrupting Cow.

Interrupting co....

MMOOOOOOOO!

We have a parade tomorrow in town and Betsey will be marching with the school band. I'm a little nervous about it. She will be out and about, on the road for quite a few hours between drop off at the designated location and the end of the parade. It is through snack time for her, and she'll need to carry all of her goodies and supplies with her and rely on her sensor for quick blood sugar checks. Of course she can always scootch out to the side and test if she has to if she feels low, but knowing Betsey, she probably wouldn't do it because she'd be afraid of causing a commotion. As always, with something new, the fear of the unknown & I feel a little loss of the control because I don't have a set plan. In the morning I will make sure we have a plan in place.

To my knowledge, she has never dropped low playing her instrument, though I always thought it would be a problem. Maybe I was mixing that up with that light-headedness you get when you blow up balloons?

Blood work & Speedo's 30-miler

Betsey had her blood work done this morning. I think we do it every 2 years at this point. The work up is for a cholesterol screening, celiac disease screening and a thyroid check. Maybe a couple other things in there too. For someone who pokes themselves so often and sees blood on a regular basis, it's hard to watch them quiver in the chair prior to getting stuck by someone else. The nurse who drew her blood was so sweet and lovely, walked her through it completely right down to the terminology of the things she was using (love that!) I had the 2 littles with us, so they watched wide eyed and I held her hand. They only needed 2 vials, but it was 2 vials too many for my girl! After the poke to get the needle in, her eyes welled up and several tears dripped down her beautiful face. :( It was over in a matter of minutes, but it was traumatic for her. Luckily we only have to do that once in a while.

On a happy note-Speedo, Jen and I went out for Speedo's first real bike ride this weekend! 30 miles that booger did with us! I was impressed. Only his 3rd time out on the bike!! He had done a few spin classes the 2 days in a row prior and all day Saturday complained about sore ars. You can imagine the pity party I threw him.....

The funny thing was that it was in the morning - a time when Speedo does not work out, nor is he in his best form, read: happy. It takes him a good hour to wake up and feel out the day. So the ride to Jen's was ....quiet... we didn't chat much. He was getting a feel for his legs on the bike and his breathing, cause he was workin'!

Speedo wears glasses... well, he's supposed to wear them. Of course he didn't have them on the morning of the bike ride, but if he had had them on, he would have seen the stick, ok, large log with feelers on the road in his path. I was about 5 feet behind him and heard a loud ka-CHUNK-thug-rattle-grrrrrrr.-hissssssssssssss.... and noticed right away, the stick was stuck in his tire/chain. I don't know if he didn't know it was there, or just decided to ignore it for a few pedal strokes, but he kept on pedaling-?! I dropped back even more not knowing what his plan was........again, it was early in the morning and he's not a morning person.

Just before I was about to announce that he had something, a rawther large hunk of wood, hanging onto his bike and he might want to dismount and detach the extra object - in case he didn't know it was there - he very abruptly took his sneaker out of his cage and proceeded to kick at it so hard that his bike was swerving and I thought, Sweet Mother of Abraham Lincoln, is this how the bike ride is going to go? He disengaged the piece of wood from his bike after a few more vigorous kicks and side swipes with his foot and continued on...just like that. I really wanted to go up next to him and make sure he was 'good to go' but decided to give him his space. Plus, I was laughing, really laughing.... That would not have gone over well and I am quite sure, he would have ended his bike ride right there at about that 3/4 mile mark.

It was a fine 30 miles after that and I look forward to the next one with him. Always something to send me into a laughing tizzy working out with him..... One time I'll, share about our time at the gym together....

Rain Rain Go Away...

A welcome day off today. Slept in until 7:30!! I don't remember the last time I did that! I woke to several little people in bed next to me watching Tom & Jerry, fresh brewed coffee wafting up the stairs from the kitchen, and rain spattering the deck off our room. Good day to sleep in.

Blueberry pancakes and french toast for breakfast. I'd feel a smidgy guilty if it weren't raining again. When will it end??

3:30am Wake Up Call

As a parent, you know when someone is in your room, you can just feel them there. But you're not really awake, something just tells you that you have company. I thought I heard a little person in our room in the wee hours of the morning, but they were visiting the other side of the bed. Speedo's side. This is the side the little people go to if they want to come in our bed at night. They know I'll most likely bring them back in their room for a quick tuck in and "shhh, go back to bed..." so they visit their Daddy. Speedo, on the other hand, welcomes them in by rolling over so they have room, or hoisting them over him so they can fit snuggly in between us.

Moments after the feeling of company, but no bed movement following, Speedo is grabbing my leg waking me.

Betsey is sick. She's in the bathroom. Her little sister had heard her calling us ever so faintly from down the hall using all the energy she had. That girl hears everything when she is sleeping. She hears spiders moving on her walls.

I run into the bathroom from a completely deep sleep. It's that time of the morning where I tend to be a heavy sleeper....the hour before the alarm sounds for me to get up and get going.

In my sleepy, harried state, I try to wake up to pull it together, knowing we have a diabetes crisis. OK. Let's test, I say. Did you test yet? She says no. Her head is in her hands, she is whimpering. The DB is in her room. I ask Speedo to get the array of supplies we'll be needed to remedy this inevitable bout of ketones. I grab the DB to test her. She is 489!!! Failed site. Site change was yesterday....1 day overdue and it failed. Darn it!

We pull out the old site, get a new one in her and I give her a shot of insulin in her arm and allow the pump to give her the suggested dose. I put a temp rate on for 2 hours, 200%. That's alotta insulin!

Then she starts throwing up. Of course she does. Darn it again! Her ketone test strips showed moderate to large! Ugh.

I got about 20 minutes of sleep between the time Bets went back to bed and my alarm sounded for the beginning of my day. I tippy-toed into her room to test her again to see where she was at before I headed out to run. 401 and she feels sick again. I hate ketones. Hate them.

Just when things kind of coast along with diabetes, when you fall into a pattern where things are good, you kind of let your guard down a bit, then WHAM! Always. It's inevitable. I remember one time when things were going really well, I'm talking maybe 2 months of good stuff. Almost like Betsey was just doing it like every other healthy kid. Sure enough, we got a doozy. We had to break out the glucagon. The dreaded glucagon.

When the hospital explained to us what the glucagon was and when I explain it to others that have to have it with them in the event they are with Betsey for an extended period of time, it makes me and them shudder.

("Here is the glucagon. Use this if Betsey falls into a coma or passes out, but call 911 first....then call me. You OK with that?")

(picture from childrenwithdiabetes.com)

The glucagon comes in a red case. It holds a syringe prefilled with liquid and a vial containing powdered glucagon. You mix it right before you'll need to use it. It is used to bring blood sugar up quickly in a diabetic who is having a severe case of hypoglycemia (low blood sugar) ultimately to save their life.

It was around Easter time, and for dessert the little people were having those delicious mini cadbury eggs. Betsey had eaten her dinner and had insulin running through her from that, and then bolused for the sugary sweet dessert. She didn't eat more than 5 of those eggs when she said out of the blue that she felt sick. She barely made it to the garbage can. It was the dreaded tummy bug!! She had so much insulin from dinner running through her and was throwing up all the food she had just consumed. We took the pump off to stop delivery. It didn't help. About an hour later, she was on the couch, pale and her numbers were constantly dipping. From the 80's, 70's - one of the last ones was a 40-something. I tried to wipe sugar on her lips, feed her canned peach syrup, honey, life savors.... nothing worked; she couldn't keep anything down. Finally I called Yale back and they said, "It's time for the glucagon."

That was one of the harder things for Speedo and me. I don't know why. That glucagon in it's red case is just such an emergency thing, a last resort. I had Yale stay on the phone to walk me through it for support. We ended up bringing Betsey to the ER and they gave her an anti nausea, IV fluids and eventually, after a long night, we went home in the early hours of the morning with her sugars stabilized.

Betsey is still home today. A quick check a minute ago, 83 and feeling a bit better. All that insulin is going to catch up and it's going to be a crazy fluctuating day, I can feel it.

New Family-Diabetes Rule

Today we enjoyed visiting with family for my nephew, who is also my Godson, in celebration of his First Communion. Following the mass was a luncheon at my sister's house with oodles of yummy nibbles and a delicious cake. I helped myself to two large pieces of that naughty stuff trying to stock up on the carbs for Sunday morning's ride -this is how I justify it- that is going to kick my tush, I know it already. The children played kickball, played on the swing set, used the zip line and nibbled here and there.

Betsey nibbles too. She doesn't always test before each helping of food if they're half an hour in between, but every couple hours she should test to make sure her activity level and her insulin running through her are working well together.

This never happens when we're nibbling with folks. Never.

She'll glance at her pump to see what her sensor reads, and that's OK. Better than not knowing at all. And it's pretty accurate so I am alright with that. But all the nibbling, the bolus here, bolus there, forgetting to bolus.... It catches up. And then we have "the rule."

Our rule for Bets is that if her sugar reads above 200 mg/dl, she may not have a goodie -- cake, cookies, ice cream, candy... a goodie. That is a tough rule. Quite frankly, it sucks. And I hate enforcing it. We do let it slide sometimes, the guilt is too much for me.

We spent the large majority of the day at the party, and when we got home we were all inundated with yard work. All the little people were playing so well outside, enjoying the break from the ridiculous rain we've had. Before we knew it, it was 7:00 and no one had had dinner. I don't remember the last time Betsey tested.

I had grabbed a 3 layer chocolate cake at the grocery store , because, well, let's face it, I needed more carbs, again, for the ride in the morning. Always need those extra carbs.

For the bike ride.

When we finished eating Betsey was double checking her sugar. She was 304!! Whoopsie daisy. Someone nibbled some goodies and didn't punch in. The grazing on bits and pieces here and there and not bolusing caught up with her. The 3 layer chocolate cake was definitely out of the question for Betsey. As Speedo sliced, Betsey got that look in her eye, the one that just about kills me because she knows she can't have a piece, and she knows I'll surely say no, especially at 304- that's not a negotiable number. And that cake looked mighty fine. Speedo chirped in, "I won't have any either Bets."

We're talking 3 layer, double chocolate cake with ganache on top. The thing reeked of goodness.

Willpower.

He's a man. For a woman to say that, it takes more than willpower. It takes a trip to the scale in the bathroom, pulling out your wedding dress that no longer fits, looking in the mirror at Marshalls in the winter (!) and then, it's [sort of] easy to say, "No, thank you."

So the new Family Diabetes Rule was set in place tonight. When Betsey is running high and can't have the sweets offered, someone will offer up their sweets also. So she is not alone.

Very quickly, with a mouthful of chocolate cake, her brother said he'd do it..............next time.

Sensor Pie Charts

I uploaded Betsey's sensor info last night to send off to Yale for her nurse to look at. Her graph looked much better than the one I previously shared - I had made some adjustments to her pump settings after that and once again in between. She still seems to be going higher than she should in the wee hours of the morning.

There is something type 1 diabetics can encounter called the dawn phenomenon which is high blood sugars in the early morning hours before waking. If left untreated with insulin pump adjustments or shot adjustments before bed, the sustained high blood sugars in those early hours can cause the nausea upon waking, which may be attributed to ketones building in the body. Not good stuff.

The dawn phenomenon occurs because there is not enough insulin to keep the blood sugar down, obviously. This happens when during the night, the body releases hormones that trigger the liver to release glucose. In non diabetics, our body adjusts for us and release the right amount of insulin to correct it and keep us balanced, so to speak. With Betsey, she relies on the pump settings I, along with Yale, have set for her. Her pump doesn't respond to elevating blood sugars and give extra insulin. Her sensor will beep and alarm if she is going high, but she and I don't always wake for that.

When I upload her sensor readings online, I am able to look at her graphs and see whats going on while we sleep.

This is the chart from this past week. The left side of the chart is 12 am and then each vertical line is in 2 hour increments. Each day is color coded so you can follow one color for the day and then keep the reading by following the next day's color back at the left side. Make sense? The green bar is Betsey's ideal blood sugar range. This chart looks OK. But I can see from about 11:00pm until 4:00am, she is running high. The problem with making adjustments during this time frame is the fear of her going too low. And since there are a couple of nights where she was in range and even dipped low (below the green bar) around 10:45pm, I rely on Yale to help me decide what to do.



This is a pie chart from her sensor readings this past week. The white part of the pie is the time during each day she was "in range" - blood glucose between 80-130 mg/dl. The yellow part indicates high blood sugars and the orange are lows.

It is tough to balance I tell ya! I'd love to find a graph of a non diabetic to compare, knowing what it would look like, but just to see it. It's amazing how much work it is to try and get it just so. I marvel at those that can get their A1C in the low 6's!

Wine-ing While Riding

Nutrition is huge when you're doing endurance events. I have learned this the hard way after bonking a few times on the bike and during long runs. I know what I have to do to prevent it, especially with my food intake the day before, but I don't always follow what I should be doing.

Last night we had dinner and drinks with Ted & Lauren and Amy & Dale at our favorite local hang out. I love the interaction outside of workout clothes, when we can discuss things other than exercise. There's always something you can learn about someone that you didn't know already, or just enjoy the company they bring to the table. We enjoyed ourselves so much that I didn't think twice about what I ate... or didn't eat.

I picked at my salad. I had filled up on a couple glasses of wine while we laughed and laughed and discussed everything from interesting conversations about TMJ issues to mercenaries. And I was pretty much breathing mayonnaise from the spinach artichoke dip I inhaled.

I knew we were biking 50 miles in the morning, but the company and conversation during our night out made the upcoming ride in the early hours of the morning seem like everything would be OK, somehow. Well, that was the wine talking.

When my alarm went off at 4:25, my gosh, I think I still had some beverages flowing through me. Not good. It took every amount of focusing at that hour of the morning to get myself together and get out the door to meet up with the group. Looking back, I am surprised I didn't wipe out on the way to meet up with Aim!

What a gorgeous ride today though-- we went into a beautiful part of the state, farms aplenty & horse manure filling my senses -- love nature! About 30 miles in, I was more than "wining" and I could feel myself becoming more and more fatigued. I dropped out past my house at 47 miles and took a long hot shower.

I showered until the water ran cold.

I think Amy said to me 6 times on the ride, "I can't drink anymore." "No more drinking for me."

Well, certainly not on the eve of a long ride or run.

Now for some cheese to go with that whine....

Morning Glory Muffins

Some things are just meant to be....

This morning was a big morning in terms of training. Four of us were set to do a sprint tri for training. Half an hour in the pool, jump on bikes for a tough 12 mile bike, and then off for a 3.2 mile run. The YMCA doesn't open until 7am so we were able to sleep in a bit, always a luxury these days. Although, waking at 6:00 always seems a little late.

My bag was packed, my body was fueled up and ready to go. Amy picked me up on time (always) and we met Maureen and Jen at the pool. Clothing layers off. Swim caps and goggles on. The four of us sat by the edge of the pool for about 5 minutes, dangling our piggies in the 79 degree water contemplating our swim... should we swim for a straight half an hour? Maybe do some drills? How about I write it down on the white board so we have some direction? Or coffee?

What?

The look on Jen's face was priceless.

Amy agreed, jokingly, waiting to be talked out of it. Certainly that wouldn't be my job.

I said, "I dare you to get out of the pool and go for coffee!"

She wasn't even in the pool...

Up she went, ripped off her cap and goggles... I jumped up, giggling like a catholic school girl who just decided to chew gum in class....off went my cap and goggles...

Maureen and Jen looked dumbfounded. Maureen face read "Are you for real? Blow off a training day? I'm in!" and up she got, ripped off her cap quicker than I ripped off mine. We started walking towards the door to leave, Jen dragging her feet behind, mouth open, cap and goggles still on....

I have told her on numerous occasions that her mother would not have let us hang out when we were younger.

Into the locker room we go, my adrenaline was rushing. Why was this so bad? Why was it so careless? Why did it feel so good? The pathetic thing is, this is naughty behavior for us. And it cracks me up!

We get outside and Jen had barely uttered four words. I think her legs were just walking for her, her conscious still in the pool room. I love that about Jen - always wanting to do the right thing. Always thinking about the repercussions. And I love that I can help her to wiggle outside of her comfort zone.

Then we all realized we didn't have our wallets. No one had any money! Maureen suggested we use her husband's stash of just-in-case-cash, but when she looked, there was none. And then Jen found Mr. Fancy Pants' wallet -- 2 twenties and some singles. Paydirt!!

Off to a local yokel muffin joint we went for omelets and a morning glory muffin, grilled please, for Maureen. A lovely hour of coffee and conversation.

It was a morning meant to be. It's days like this I savor and love about the people I train with.

Thanks Mr. Fancy Pants for breakfast! Next time, though, I vote for a brunch!

JDRF Dinner

Thanks to Kurt and his wife Sue, they opened up their home this past weekend to some of us training together for the JDRF ride! Oddly enough, Louse and Kurt were dressed as twins.... again. Shocker. And we were able to finally meet our New Haven Chapter Leader, Charlotte!

Kurt was asked to be the Coach for our team, which I think is "unofficially" named Team Shoreline....? I like to ride with him, only if I can keep up to draft behind him, the speedy devil. One day recently, incidently, the early morning after the BBQ at his house, he forgot his clip shoes and was forced to wear sneakers and we were all psyched because we could keep up with him!! Perhaps he should do that more often.

We had a nice evening, lots of kiddies and some yummy munchies! Thanks guys! Can't wait for the next one! Who is the brave soul that dares to have all those kids at their house next? My vote is Louse's place with the pool..... Louse?

(Watch the photo slide show below. Make sure sound is on.)